Review of Twin Ports Spay and Neuter.
By Scott Lundberg
The good…they are very patient and kind. I brought in my Great Dane Goose the Moose destroyer of worlds and woo-er of wenches for a little bit of I’ll take you down a notch or two. He disagreed rather vigorously and the staff handled him beautifully and took great care of him.
The bad…Be very careful which line you get into. I was not paying attention and found myself spread eagled on a freezing stainless steel table whilst restrained. I could not see but felt oh so warm and knowledgeable hands expertly prepping me via razor for a reason that slowly dawned in my distracted mind. Did I mention these hands were VERY KNOWLEDGEABLE and cupped not only my nethers but perhaps my very soul. I mumbled that it was some sort of mistake but it came out sounding like “don’t stop”. Finally by furiously bucking my hips in frantic Morse code fashion I was able to stop the proceedings just in time. Turns out my wife had accidentally written down my name on the forms. It was an accident right snookums? Honey? I’m intending on going back weekly.*
*The bad is totally made up and is in no way representative of the actual business. It’s purely wishful thinking and or disgusting. Shame on me. Sooo knowledgeable.
SCOTcrateese 
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